Him: Hey, man! How’s it going? 😀
Me: I’m all good.
Him: You don’t seem like it, asshole.
Me: Do you really have to call me that? Well, I am a bit off since last night. Aside from the professor who didn’t show up after requiring us to resubmit a research paper, my mates were pressuring me to join a school pageant.
Him: What? Lol. Really?
Me: Not funny. -_-
Him: So what’s the matter with that? Did you accept it?
Me: No, of course not. You know I can’t do it. I never planned to join such contest in my entire life. It’s crazy for me to believe that they really think I can, besides, I think part of them is just trying to make fun out of it.
Him: So what’s your point? You can just simply ignore them… Or else you really wanted to accept it and now your regretting! Ha!
Me: What the heck are you saying? Shut up. -_-
Him: You can’t fool me, I saw the desire in your eyes.
Me: I wanna punch your face right now.
Him: Violent, huh.
Me: Do you even think I look that good?
Him: I think you look stupid. Lol. Don’t ask me a question that has already an answer in your mind.
Me: Do you see this huge belly? I’m 2 months pregnant, I can’t join.
Him: Shush, I know you. You may seem not like it but you’re the kind of person who likes having new experiences and believes that there’s always something to get out of it. You have this imaginary arsenal of scrolls about things you have learned in life, and you’re forcibly infusing these with your awkward sense of humor so you can at least share them to your future kids, friends and some people around the world. That could be something to write about.
Me: Fvck you, you’re saying too much.
Him: You honestly felt grateful that you were offered an opportunity that not everybody gets. You want to be developed but you lack guts. You’re always afraid and tend to over-analyze, maybe that’s also why you fail in starting a relationship and —
Me: *punches hard*
Him: Ouch, man!
Me: You’re going too far. Put back your leash so I can restrain you right there. Hey, I’m not regretting. I’m just having thoughts after being brainwashed by this dude (hi, Gene). He thought I got mad at him after leading the persuasion. I’m not! Actually, I just feel lame about myself and I hate the feeling of turning down people. Maybe I wasn’t prepared of it, they should have asked me like a year in advance or so. Loljk.
Him: For rice’s sake!
Me: Why are you like that to me. You’re my conscience, I thought we’re supposed to have same minds.
Him: Shitty, no one is supposed to have an awesome mind as I do have.
Me: Oh! Of course, coz mine’s way better. Anyway, I’m now 99.9 percent sure that I can’t do it. Just imagining myself walking upstage, posing for pictorials and answering pageant question, make me cringe. Lol. Also, I don’t get it when they all try to push me hard but when I try to reverse the situation, they won’t do it either. Don’t people know the Golden Rule?
Him: Are you done? I feel hungry.
Me: Me too.
Him: Let’s eat!
My mean conzcience,